I said "no" to something

And was immediately met with a “whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?” Said I’m in a way that only a whining four year old can say it. I don’t even know what he was asking, but I can tell you that nothing makes me want to say “no” more than whining. Aparently im the type of parent to digs in her heels instead of relenting when met with whining. It sounds better on the surface but doesn’t accomplish anything more relationally than giving In does.

I know it’s because I’ve been short. I’m exhausted, I need a break and his incessant questions and his litter brothers tantrums that have been rapidly increasing over the last few months I’m just done. I can’t take anymore questions. I can’t hear anymore whining.

They’re like little emotional mirrors. If I’m off, they know it and they’re off too. Whining, crying, tantruming… all the things I feel on the inside but have learned to hold. It’s like they’re exterior manifestations of my own emotions sometimes. Why they gotta be so codependent? I tell them all the time it’s okay to feel angry/sad/tired/overwhelmed but if I feel those emotions my whole family falls apart. And let me tell you, being the emotional barometer for my family is exhausting.

Mom just wants it to be okay that she’s having a bad day.